Another summer, another bicycle adventure. This time, the bums are taking it to The Man. We’re heading to the Twin Cities of Minnesota, which will be hosting the Republican National Convention in August. We hope to get there in time to help the locals roll out the welcoming mat the republicans (and democrats) deserve after 8 years of war, fearmongering, environmental destruction, eroding civil liberties…whatever, you know the score. When rabble-rousers from round the country gather in St. Paul to show bush, mccain, and the whole lot what-for, we’ll be there to lend our support.
As gas prices continue to rise (and, friends, they ain’t gonna get any cheaper), we’ll be making our way across this nation powered only by what we can cram down our gullets, focusing not on mpg, but mpp (miles per pizza/pie). We’ll be talking to folks about what’s important to them. We’ll be checking out how small-town america has fared the last 8 years. We’ll be enjoying this country’s open spaces before they’re all mowed down for ethanol farms. We’ll be taking orders for the pastel ponies everyone will receive if Obama gets elected.
The highlight of this trip will surely be the first week, during which we will be escorted by a crack team of cycling superstars. Let’s take a look at the lineup:
- Rai Sue Sussman – Cross-country veteran; champion of the mixtie; sardine advocat
- Nick Raymond – Mild-mannered bookstore owner; orginator of the famed ‘mantis’ cycling technique; perrenial beardsman
- Jeff GiaQuinto – The Rookie; Chief Commissar of Making Lists; trombone badass
- Heather Love – The walk on; the comeback kid; how far will this all-star go?
- Greg Michalec – Bikebums regular; migratory barfly; ice-cream sandwich addict
- Megan – Food Documentor; Can consume her own weight in pie
When these 12 wheels hit the road, there’s no telling what will happen. Remember: If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can ride with… The BikeBums!